Ministry Friendships

I love the way pastor's wife Christine @ Grace Covers Me blogs.  She is very detailed, yet void of details.  She's specific, yet not specific.  I struggle with that when sharing my ministry struggles.  But, I'm going to try:

When people begin with, "I wish our church..." I immediately tense up.  I think, "Are they upset with something my husband is doing?  What do I need to say?  Should I respond?  If so, how?"  But when it happened again last night, I was in total agreement with what this person was saying regarding a particular ministry of the church.  How do I respond in cases like that?  I shared my thoughts and ideas that I'd had (ones that I'd previously discussed with my husband) and yet I came home with a sinking feeling.

Normally, I am mum.  I dare not say anything.  And yet I want to be a good member of the church (aside from my role as pastor's wife); I want to be a member who is daily in God's Word and learning doctrine not only to deepen my own faith in Jesus, but to help draw others in our church to Him.  Discussing things like my (& Brian's) desire to have a Titus 2 sort of ministry is a good thing to discuss with friends. My desires for our members/friends/family to be reading good theology books, in God's Word daily, etc. is a good thing to discuss (shoot, I'm not being vague like Christine).  But yet there's that sinking feeling - as if I was making them all feel guilty for not doing x,y, and z.

Guilt was not my intention.  I was just sharing my heart.  The burdens of ministry are like houseguests (love Christine's analogy), constantly with Brian & me and being discussed by us.  It's difficult, then, for me to just "shut-off" that portion of my being when I am around friends from church.  So then I try to be clear - I don't mean you - but the sinking feeling remains and looks of guilt or dread fill their eyes.  Maybe my desires need to stay with seminary besties or my husband or family.  Friendships in the ministry can be so tricky - I want to go deep - to know and be known - but I never want to make them feel guilty.  I want them to love Jesus with their whole hearts and be my friend!  OR I want face-time with my besties.  I feel like I'm asking too much!  Any thoughts?